hello. it me. Zamboni. been long time. mean company who have same name as me have meaner lawyers. that why i no post for 2 years. me fix that though. have new name. name is now Wang. guido still guido. he still goat too. mom still mom. horatio still horatio. horatio still my penis. henrietta still my hand. henrietta love horatio. she pet horatio all the time. make horatio throw up white stuff. feel good though. white stuff taste good. sticky though. always get in my hair. miss everyone very much while i was gone. glad i am back. hope you glad too. guido says BAAAAAAA. live in new place now. like new place. we have pool. pee in pool all the time. other times i pee in shower. pee warm. pee salty. good on french fries. make french fries soggy. soggy salty french fries good though. poop in shower too. clog drain though. make water look like chocolate. poop good. like to eat better than chocolate. people who live here won’t let guido in pool. they say no goats allowed. that no fair. guido get hot too. guido poop in pool. i only poop in shower. maybe that why they no let him in pool. i fill up tub and we play in there. goat poop good too. real good if guido eat berries first. make poop purple. purple goat poop with berries even better than my poop. yum yum. guido watching tv right now. he like watching porn. goats have more white goo come from their penis than me. lots more. taste different than my white goo. still good though. still sticky. it get in my hair all the time too. well i better go now. left grease gun stuck in guido’s butt. have to get him slippery to get my whole head in there. i go exploring there. it is fun place to explore and play. have to remember to wear safety goggles. juices in goat anuses burn. burn bad. even though i change my name i still me. just now my name is Wang. hope you all still love me. me and guido love you very much. all of you. me have cam now also. if you want to see me go to http://enraged.net/cams.html me on third cam down. enraged.net new home for me on web. good place. Wang love people who work there. they like poop like i do. guido says BAAAAAA and horatio waves hello. bye bye now.

Wang

hello. it me. Zamboni. i come back to see you all again. been long busy summer. went on vacation in summer. went with mom and guido. go to beach. beach in florida. me like florida. many pretty women on beach. women with big bouncy boobies. mom have big boobies. they no bounce though. just hang there. they hang low. they hang low like guido’s goat testicles. goat testicles good. me like goat testicles. like to suck on. roll from side to side in my mouth. goat hair get in mouth though. stick to roof of mouth. feel funny. still good though. we fly on plane to florida. have to put guido on leash at airport. me put on sunglasses. they no normally let goats on plane. me pull old seeing eye goat trick. work every time. we get to metal detector. security man big. he look at guido. he say is that a goat? i say no, it your mother. me laugh. he no laugh. some people have no sense of humor. he pull out night stick. mom moan in anticipation. she hope he use it on her. other man tell him to put it away. they say no goat allowed on plane. i say i blind. he seeing eye goat. tell them it new experimental thing. he say no way. i say yes way. he let us go through. mom ask if they do full body cavity search. man say not usually. man ask her why. ask her if she hiding anything. mom reach under skirt. pull tampon out of her pussy. oh that mom. she such a meanie. she know we no have time for breakfast. now me hungry. it look like a good one too. all shiny wet with chewy clots hanging from it. security man turn away. he tell her to go through. tell her to get the hell away from him. we go to gate. board plane. stewardess at plane door. her name jane. she pretty. really fat though. i tell her i am blind. ask her to help me to my seat. she stare at guido. she just shake her head. she tell me to hold onto her and she take me to seat. me wrap arms around her waist. she ask what i doing. i say holding on. she say to hold her hand. me say oh. me say that she really big woman. tell her me like it like that. she say she pregnant. have baby soon. i say oh. me ask if i can have window seat. she say she thought i was blind. i say i pretend to see things. she shake her head again. plane take off now. jane come by and give me cookies. me love cookies. they good cookies. not goat turd cookies though. they the best. she ask me what i want to drink. i say milk. tell her i get it myself. she say no. she get it for me. me reach out and grab her boobie. me squeeze it real hard. jane scream. people around me scream. jane ask what the hell i think i am doing. tell her i getting milk. tell her me breast fed as baby. she start beating me in head with serving tray. it hurt very bad. mom moans hoping she beat her with tray too. other stewardesses pull jane off me. jane calling me many names. too many to remember. mom groan again hoping she talk dirty to her while beating her with tray. jane never come near me again for rest of flight. we land in florida. get off plane. jane glare at me. evil glare. oh well. her loss. i know she want me. she know she just not woman enough to handle me. go to hotel and unpack. change to swim trunks. go to beach. guido been saving up poop since we leave home. he have to poop bad. lots of poop. good poop. he poop big pile on beach. big fat goat turds. they have green fuzzy texture. like moss on tree. we have corn for dinner last night. so they have much corn in them too. me pick up goat turd. smear all over body. me pick off pieces of corn and eat. yum yum. me love suprise treats. goat turds make good sunblock. keep zamboni healthy. ultraviolet rays harmful to Zamboni. mom found big crab on beach. mom already have many crabs. they little though. they live in her coochie. this crab much bigger though. still could live in moms coochie. mom have one big coochie. guido stretch her out. goat fucking make mom one loose chick. goats have big dicks you know. crab have big pinchers. mom undo her bikini top. let crab pinch her nipples. me glad mom enjoying vacation. me and guido run off to play. into the pounding surf. the sun setting over the ocean. a boy and his goat. living a picture postcard moment. bye bye now.

Zamboni stories on the web: all Zamboni stories archived at http://www.smart.net/~boogie/zamboni.html (editor’s note: sadly, boogie’s house of obscenities is no longer around…) they archived there by daniel. he good person. you can reproduce anywhere you like. crosspost to other newsgroups. on the web. on bbs. pass them out at the office. give them as gifts. me no care. they for you. all of you. so enjoy them. i love you all.

Zamboni

hello. it me. Zamboni. me have birthday party today. today not my birthday though. it two weeks ago. mom no have party then. she was busy. farm machinery convention was in town then. she make lots of money from farm machine people. they horny old men. not many people at party. just me mom and guido. guido mom’s goat. he mom’s sex toy. my best friend. mom buy cool party hats. they pointy on top. we have noise makers too. kind you blow in. got tired of blowing mine. put up guido’s butt. guido farts and it make noise. smelly noise. smell good. take out of guido’s butt. me blow some more. taste different now. smell different too. someone knock on door. me go open door. it clown. it big fat clown. i ask who he is. he say i bobo. bobo the clown. he say mom ask him to come to my birthday party. me say ok. me let him in. Zamboni like clowns. me see them at circus. they always happy. clowns funny. me give clowns at circus the finger. that make clowns mad. mad clowns even funnier. mom come in. she say hi to bobo. bobo ask mom when he get paid. mom say she take care him later. me ask bobo if he know magic. he say yes. he reach behind my ear. he pull out quarter. he give me quarter. me put in guido’s butt. i get it later. it be safe there. he pull out deck of cards. tell me to pick card. any card. me pick card. he say not to show. tell me to put it back in deck. he pull out 3 of clubs. he ask if that my card. i say no. he pull out 7 of hearts. me say no. he pull out 10 of spades. me say no. he mad now. clown start cussing. cussing clowns are the funniest. card was really 3 of clubs. me lie. he funnier this way. someone knock on door again. mom open door. it two more clowns. they midget clowns. me say hello. they ask if i birthday boy. i say yes. they say they friends of bobo. they say their names frankie and harry. we all sit down. mom give me present. me open present. it pair of mom’s panties. dirty panties. have brown stains all over them. me thank mom. me ask mom if i can put them on now. she say go ahead. me put on. put on head. they smell so good. make Zamboni head spin. all of sudden…clowns grab me. they throw me on table. they laughing loud. scary laughing. me ask mom what going on. she say it time for my birthday spankings. me like spankings. never been spanked by clowns before. they all naked now. oh this weird. naked midget clowns. i am lucky boy. not many boys get spanked by naked midget clowns. they grab guido too. i ask what they do with guido. they say they want to spank him too. i say it not his birthday. they start spanking. me start screaming. YAAAAAA!!!! YAAAAA!!!! guido screaming. BAAAAAA!!!!! BAAAAAA!!! me not know midet clowns could spank so hard. me look for mom. she not here. where she go? now she come back. uh oh. she have that look on her face. she snapped again. she lose control. she wearing the super duper strap on dildo. she grab bobo the clown. me yell LOOK OUT BOBO! too late. she bend bobo over. she fuck bobo in ass with super duper strap on dildo. bobo’s eyes bug out. look like thay going to pop from his head. only bobo’s clown makeup smiling now. he look funny. bobo the funniest clown in the world. bobo yell out MY PROSTATE! YOU ARE KILLIN ME BITCH! never heard clown say anything like that at circus before. they should do this at circus. much funnier. mom in a frenzy now. she pull strap on out of bob’s butt. she point it at frankie and harry. mom cackling and drooling now. she say COME HERE YOU TWO! I WANNA FUCK YOUR MIDGET CLOWN ASSES! they look scared. they run out door. they still naked. naked midget clowns running down street. oh i love clowns. they so funny. maybe i be a clown when i grow up. bobo still lying there. mom ask if he ready for more. he move now. he run out door too. no more clowns. oh well. it was fun while it lasted. me thank mom. tell her it best birthday ever. she say she do it because she love me and guido very much. we tell her we love her too. Zamboni lucky to have a family that love him. me thank God every day. bye bye now.

Zamboni

hello. Zamboni here. missed you guys. horatio wave hello to all. guido say BAAAAA! horatio is my penis. guido is mom’s goat. she likes anal sex with goats. mom says there is nothing quite like a big hot sticky goat load getting shot in your butt. i prefer it in my mouth. goat spew is yummy yummy yummy for Zamboni’s tummy. guido is my best friend. we go everywhere together. Zamboni hungry. need food. go to refrigerator. look for food. no food there. see tupperware container. open it up. goat poop in container. goat poop is yummy. not in mood for goat poop though. goat poop more of a dessert than a meal. will save for later. put goat poop back. need money to buy food. will go see how much money i have. look in secret money hiding place. hide money in mom’s douche bag. she no use it anymore. she use garden hose instead. oh that mom. she got one smelly coochie. smell good though. mom smell like fish. taste like chicken though. look in douche bag. only have 28 cents. can’t buy any good food with 28 cents. try to think of way to get money. want to go to bob’s burger bistro. want to get burger with extra mayonaise. mayonaise good. remind me of guido. mayonaise taste like guido’s goat sperm when he had prostrate infection. yum yum yum. that give Zamboni idea. he go to sperm bank. donate sperm. they pay money. 25 whole dollars. 25 dollars would be mayonaise burger feast for me and guido. an’t take bus to get there. have no money for bus. will hitchhike. go to highway. stick out thumb. many cars go by. noone stop. tell guido to turn around. stick his sexy goat butt out. guido’s sexy goat butt. oh it excite me. someone stop for sure now. stick my thumb back out. horatio stick out now too. horatio like a hot goat ass too. car slow down. walk up to car. man roll down car window. he ask where we go. me say downtown. he ask me what kind of dog i have. i say that no dog. that guido. he a goat. he just say ummmm. then he say ok get in. we get in car. he say his name is Arnie. i say me Zamboni. this guido. arnie seem like nice man. he keep farting though. his farts smell good. smell like rotten eggs. smell is strong. almost thick. smell so strong Zamboni can taste arnie’s farts. lucky me. what a treat. we get downtown. arnie say if we want a ride back we should meet him in half hour. me say ok. sperm bank 2 blocks away. we walk to sperm bank. go inside. go in mens room. take off underwear. go to front desk. hand nurse my underwear. she ask what this? i say donation. say hot goat ass got me a little too excited. tell her it fresh though. she tell us to leave. i ask for my 25 dollars. she threaten to call police. what a rip off. Zamboni still hungry. me ask for my donation back. eat donation. protein good for developing my young muscles. go back to car. wait for arnie he back now. we start driving. arnie still farting. don’t smell like eggs anymore. smell kind of like oranges and asparagus now. still smell good though. wait a minute. that not arnie farting. that guido pooping. he pooping in back seat. i tell arnie sorry. tell him i clean it up. i tell him i save goat poop. arnie say he like goat poop too. he ask if he can guido’s goat poop. i say no way. he beg. i say no. say goat poop too valuable. he offer me 10 dollars. me think about it. goat poop 10 dollars 10 dollars goat poop. 10 dollars still buy pretty many mayonaise burgers. me say ok. me put goat poop in glove compartment. it was extra good goat poop. had pieces of corn sticking out of it. goat poop and corn good combination. vegetables will keep you healthy. me ask arnie to drop us off bob’s burger bistro. he say ok. we go in. they say guido have to wait outside. i ask why. they say no pets allowed. i say he no pet. he my mom’s anal love hammer. they say he still have to wait outside. me say ok. me order 2 thunder burgers with double mayonaise. 2 large fries. 2 super quenchers to drink. go back outside. sit at table outside. me and guido and a couple of mayonaise burgers. living a dream. life is so sweet. bye bye now.

Zamboni

hello again. Zamboni here. Zamboni been saving his money. money he get from donating plasma. recycling aluminum cans. me save 300 dollars. me tired of riding bike everywhere. take to long. Zamboni found motorcycle for sale. only 250 dollars. Zamboni will buy. it have sidecar. that mean guido can ride with Zamboni. go to bus stop. go see man who sell motorcycle. Zamboni take guido with me. put on sun glasses. have to tell bus driver i blind. tell him guido my seeing eye goat. they no normally allow goats on bus. bus come. driver say he never heard of seeing eye goat. tell him it true. threaten to sue city for discrimination. driver mumble something about weirdos on drugs. tell Zamboni to sit down. we go to back of bus. guido want us to sit next to woman. she have no front teeth. she smell funny. that ok. guido smell funny too. she tell me i have nice goat. i tell her it moms goat. guido poop on floor. Zamboni pick up poop and put in pocket. save for later. goat poop can be handy. get to stop. get off bus. find house. knock on door. man answer. he dressed like woman. strange man. he look ok as woman. hairy though. need to shave his pits. his back too for that matter. his name is burt. introduce me to his wife. his wife named phylis. i ask him why he dress like woman if he has female wife. he say his wife lesbian. Zamboni understand now. he take me to garage. motorcycle there. Zamboni get on. guido get in sidecar. me start motorcycle. VROOOOM!! VROOOM!! it loud. me like loud though. burt ask how long Zamboni have drivers license. i tell him i no have one. he hesitate. me show him money. he say ok. Zamboni ask if he have crash helmets. we have helmet laws here. Zamboni would never want to do anything illegal. he say he only have one. i ask him what i do about a helmet or guido. he think. he say he have old leather aviators cap and goggles. say it the best he can do for guido. me say ok. put leather cap and gogles on guido. he look like world war I flying ace. he look cool. me put on my crash helmet. it red white and blue. it say bad ass mutha on the side. maybe Zamboni join a biker gang. be a hells angel or something. that would be cool. Zamboni thank burt. wave bye to burt. Zamboni take off. we go really fast. wind feel good. people in other cars look at us. guess they never seen a bad ass mutha and his flying ace goat on a motorcycle before. Zamboni no see policeman in car. he catching speeders. he turn on lights. start chasing Zamboni. me pull over. he ask me if i knew how fast i was going. i say yes. 76mph. he ask if i knew what a school zone was. i say yes. he want my license. i tell him i no have one. his face get red. he look at guido. he ask what the hell is that? i say that guido. he moms goat. mom likes goats. he ask if i use drugs. i ask why. i ask if he need some. he tell me not to be a smart ass. i put my helmet in his face. tell him to read it. tell him it say bad ass mutha. tell him that me. pepper spray hurts. he squirt it in my face after that. guido no like that. guido get out of sidecar. bite cop. bite him in the nads. he spray guido. guido still wearing goggles. a crowd gathers now. i hear him call on his radio. he call for back up. he say dispatch, this charlie 6 need backup. been attacked by a goat. officer down. officer down. Zamboni get up. try to run. cop grab my leg and trip me. he pull out his night stick. he hit guido in the nads. then he punch Zamboni in the face. Zamboni is dazed. the crowd is bigger now. i hear them screaming things. they scream RODNEY KING RODNEY KING. i hear one woman yell I GOT MY CAMCORDER RUNNIN YOU POWER HUNGRY FUCK! my head is spinning. he hit me hard. i hear sirens coming. i see people everywhere. the people are rioting. they pick Zamboni up. they pick up guido to. they carry us off chanting TO THE STREETS. TO THE STREETS. WAR IN THE STREETS! Zamboni just wanted a motorcycle. not to be on CNN. people smashing store windows. yelling FREE TVS! FREE TVS!. they put Zamboni down finally. me look around. buildings burning everywhere. Zamboni afraid. Zamboni try to remember if there was anything about goats fire and an angry mob in the book of revelations in the bible. there had to be. this must be armageddon. Zamboni see bus. me grab guido. run to bus stop. get on bus. driver ask me what happened. i tell him it the end of the world. he tell me to shutup, take my goat, and go sit down. Zamboni go home now. turn on tv. still have 50 dollars left over. me order pizza. guido loves pizza. he bus is good enough i guess. to many crazies out there anyway. bye bye now.

Zamboni

Zamboni here hello friend. it me. Zamboni. Zamboni no know where you got that copy of chapter 10. it not the original. has been altered. Zamboni’s grammar not the best. it better than that though. Zamboni attach copy of original. please change that for Zamboni. sorry homepage so normal. family members besides mom go there though. they no know about our goat fetishes. Zamboni glad to see you still archive his stories. glad you like. horatio wave hello. bye bye now.

Zamboni

smell like fish. taste like chicken.

[ Part 2: "Attached Text" ]

hello. it me again. Zamboni. Zamboni get lots of mail. mail from all over the world. Zamboni loves you all. will start posting again. only until sys admin get too much hate mail. he never get the good mail about Zamboni. horatio wave hello to all. horatio is my penis. he is my friend. Zamboni is bored. will go find guido. he is mom’s goat. mom likes goats. mom says goats give good lovin. Zamboni only think goats are ok lovin. goat sperm is yummy though. like goat turds better though. goat turds are even yummier. look for guido. go to mom’s bedroom. door is closed. put ear to door. hear muffled noises. me open door. me see guido. me see mom. guido have muzzle on. all sorts of leather gear on guido. mom has on 12 inch strap on. she fucking guido in the ass!!! mom dressed up as a nun!! oh that mom. she one kooky chick!! mom tell me to go away. say if i don’t she will use it on me. Zamboni stop to think. think might feel good. think might hurt. might be good hurt though. then again might not. ask mom to let guido go. tell mom i bored. want to play with guido. mom say no. mom take strap on out of guido’s ass. point it at Zamboni. it huge!!! mom laugh evil laugh. guido look at Zamboni. his eyes are wide. Zamboni must save guido. have to think. Zamboni run away. scared of mom’s strap on. Zamboni not brave enough to take on mom and her super duper giant strap on. me know who is though. Zamboni’s secret identity is brave enough. me run to kitchen. find goat turd on floor. rub it on face. rub on like war paint. Zamboni now goat poop warrior!!!! Zamboni stronger than the evil mom with her super duper strap on thingie!!! GOAT POOP WARRIOR TO THE RESCUE!! run to bedroom. kick in door. yell at mom. REMOVE THAT MONSTROSITY FROM THE GOAT’S ASS!! DO IT NOW WOMAN OR FACE MY WRATH!! mom look at me and laugh evil. mom say, ok goat poop boy….lets see what you got. i waste no time. i jump on her. i grab her arms and try to subdue her. her super duper strap on is flailing about. i must not let her use that. guido is screaming beneath the muzzle. he tries to kick mom. kicks me instead. kicks me in the testicles. oooooo……Zamboni’s head spinning. i fall to the floor. mom pounces on me. she shove the super duper strap on in my mouth. i am doomed. she has the advantage now. mom is laughing louder now. MUHAHAHAHAHA! strap on taste like goat poop. YUM! YUM! i love the taste of goat poop. i must regain control. i must save guido. i summon all my stregnth. i throw mom off me. grab her by her super duper strap on. flip her over my shoulder. she is dazed. i run to guido. i free him. guido is saved. i tie mom up. once again the day is saved. saved by the mighty goat poop warrior. we leave mom. leave her all tied up. i take muzzle off guido. we go outside. lots of snow outside. we play in snow. make snow goats together. we pee in snow and write our names. a boy and his goat. enjoying life as it was meant to be enjoyed. Zamboni go now. horatio waves to you all. bye bye now.

Zamboni

hello. Zamboni here. it been long time. Zamboni been very busy. work very hard. very tired. Zamboni come back. come back as christmas gift to all of you. Zamboni love you all. Zamboni had good christmas.everyone was there. Zamboni was there. that is me. mom was there. momis mom. mom is slut. guido and greta were there. they are mom’s goats. mom loves goats. mom loves goats. mom do it with goats. horatio andhenrietta were there. horatio is my penis. henrietta is my hand. horatiolove henrietta. henrietta love horatio. henrietta hug horatio all time. gave guido special christmas present this year. sent guido to vet. he have operation. remove testicles. replace with jingle bells. very festive. got to keep goat testicles. keep in jar. in jar by my bed. take them out and play with them. goat testicles fun. roll them around. we have christmas tree. we decorate tree. mom have menstrual cycle. have it week before we get christmas tree. decorate christmas tree with used tampons. red is good christmas color. Zamboni likes guido’s new balls.jingle balls. play with them all the time. guido likes when i play with jingle balls. they sound cool. we sing christmas carols. mom want tosing jingle bells. it one of our favorite songs. mom get down on all fours.we start singing. me and mom sing. jingle bells jingle bells jingle all the way. guido and greta start singing. BAAAA BAAAA BAAAA BAAAA BAAAA BAAAABA BA BA BA BA. guido see mom on all fours. guido excited now. guido start fucking mom. his jingle balls are ringing now. you can hear them. make song even better. we all still singing. mom singing and grunting now though. guido sing louder. so festive. Zamboni love christamas. Zamboni hear other bells now. hear bells on roof. Zamboni wonder if it could be santa. Zamboni hope so. Zamboni run to fireplace. Zamboni urinate on fire in fireplace. put out fire. don’t want santa to get burned. smell like burned urine. burned urine smell good. santa come down chimney. Zamboni very happy. Zamboni been good boy this year. Zamboni get lots of presents from santa. santa say ho ho ho. santa look at mom. santa look at guido. santa never seen goat with jingle balls fucking person. santa look shocked. santa smile though. santa have big stomach. santa also have big bulge in his pants. santa seem excited. santa utter magic words. reindeer appear inthe living room. even rudolph there. oh my! santa take off his clothes.santa and the reindeer start fucking mom guido and greta. it is a christmas orgy with santa and his reindeer. Zamboni hear all kinds of terrible noises. Zamboni hear guido and greta going BAAA! BAAA! BAAA! BAAAAAAAAAA! santa is just going HO! HO! HO! ON DONNER! ON BLITZEN! ON DASHER AND VIXEN! theytied mom up with the bridle from santa’s sleigh! rudolph is nose fucking mom. mom’s pussy is glowing with rudolph’s nose in it. look like neon pussy. smell like fish though. taste like chicken. ohhh…..what a wonderful christmas this is. orgy over now. everyone exhausted. now we all gather round christmas tree. we all join hands and hoofs. all still naked. we bow our heads and remember those less fortunate than ourselves this holiday season. those who have nobody. who have nothing at all. Zamboni loves you most of all. he prays for you. god assures Zamboni that everything will be right. have a good holiday kids. peace and may god bless. bye bye now. Zamboni horatio henrietta guido greta mom santa and all the reindeer say merry christmas.

it’s me again, back to tell you more. i have a gerbil. his name is fred. he has been in my butthole. i farted. smelled like eggs. don’t like eggs. sperm likes eggs. i wear panties. they are purple. i haven’t washed them this week. they are stained. i have a penis. don’t have a vagina. could have one put in. too expensive. would have to go to sweden. i like chef bork. would suck chef bork. don’t like barney . he is purple. still don’t like. would sodomize hard. i just urinated. i need a towel. i am constipated. will dig out. mom is pregnant. hope not by me. could be though. ate taco bell. won’t be constipated soon. my balls itch. will scratch. pinch and roll method. plucked my rectal hair. it hurt bad. made my eyes water. that’s o.k. pain is gone now. caused erection. will take care of. mom is home. she is naked. her tits sag. they are big. need an enema. would feel better then. would make mess. would lick up. you lick up? me don’t care. went to zoo. monkeys jack off. may taste good. fence too high. will use imagination. getting my camera. took picture of horatio. he is my cock. he is my friend. foto-mat fairy won’t like. that’s o.k. don’t like foto-mat fairy anyway. looking in trash. found used tampo n. it is sticky. put on forehead. will fix lunch. will fix hotdogs. these i like. fit in butthole. feels so good. will still eat. would feel guilty if i did not. starving children everywhere. bra is to tight. my sack is wrinkled. looks like prune. i like prunes. they make me shit. shit is slimy. slimy is good. mom is slut. i am slut. sluts are cool.i spank my gonads. they swell up. mom will kiss. make all better. i am toilet trained. i serve all.went outside. it is raining. came back in. i saw mailman. he gave me things. i went to the dentist. don’t like dentist. mouth still numb. went to bar. got real drunk. passed out in urinal. not so bad. thirsty no more. i like goats. i sodomize goats. goats are tight. make weird noises. i like that. like goat’s milk. shoot up butt. shoot out butt. lick lick lick. yum yum yum. mom is hermaphrodite. she has penis. she has vagina. oh that mom. one lucky girl or maybe boy. still not sure. hotdogs done. i put them in. they are hot. i take them out. i blow on them. put back in. that just right. in and out that feel so good. eat eat eat. yum yum yum. i see my cats. they run away. i sodomize cats. they don’t like. mom has glass eye. i take out. i skull fuck her. it is weird. will write more. some other day.

Zamboni here. horatio wave hello to all. it hot here. Zamboni can’t wait for winter. like snow. like to pee in snow. make it yellow. make it salty. mom making cookies. special cookies. goat turd cookies. like chocolate chip. except she use goat turds. yum yum yum. mom out of flour. can’t make without flour. she tell me to get more. can’t go to store. no money. will borrow some from neighbor. her name is carrie. she nice lady. she Zamboni’s friend. she pretty. go next door. knock on door. she answer. she say hello to Zamboni. invite me in. tell her horatio said hello. she tell me to keep horatio in my pants. i say ok. she ask what i want. i tell her. she out of flour too. carrie say she going to store to buy groceries for dinner. says she will get Zamboni flour. ask if i want to go. i say no. i am tired. she say i can wait there for her. say she won’t be gone long. Zamboni say ok. she leave. it quiet in here now. Zamboni turn on tv. turn on vcr. see tapes. read titles on tapes. select tape titled ” the farmers daughter…beastiality in the bible belt.” that sound like fun. put tape in. press play. movie come on. in middle of movie. someone not rewind. some people just inconsiderate. see woman. she pretty. see horse. girl like horse. horse have big cock. she give horse blow job. wonder if there are any goats in movie. like goats. will fast forward. stop fast forwarding now. still see girl. man is there now. he is farmer bob. he riding tractor naked. girl his daughter. tell her to get on tractor. says cow bessie died. have to go get her. they drive tractor to field. there is bessie. she is dead. looks like she been dead for awhile. farmer bob get off tractor. he say he want to fuck bessie. for old times sake. back half of bessie no longer there. eaten by vultures. he not give up. he loved bessie. bessie decapitated by scavenging animals. farmer bob pick up her head. he give her kiss. he pull out her eyeball with his finger. HE SKULLFUCKING BESSIE!!!! Zamboni not believe his eyes. somebody crosspost this to alt.cows.moo moo moo. his daughter get excited. she start humping gear shift on tractor. now a pickup truck pull up. oh my god it the village people. they singing that damn song. YMCA, IT FUN TO STAY AT THE YMCA…. ohhhhh. this too weird even for Zamboni. turn off vcr now. that carrie one kinky chick. horatio liked the movie. he excited now. Zamboni see snowball. he carrie’s cat. Zamboni like cats. horatio like cats. like to sodomize cats. Zamboni get some pussy. here kitty kitty kitty. nice kitty. grab snowball. try to put horatio in his butt. snowball not like that. Zamboni bleeding now. carrie come home now. she ask what happened. i tell her i was playing with snowball. she say she sorry he scratched me. Zamboni say it ok. she ask what else i do while she was gone. i tell her i watch tv. she give Zamboni flour. Zamboni say thankyou. take flour to mom. she make cookies now. can’t wait. goat turd cookies. yum yum yum. bye bye now.

hello everybody. it’s me. Zamboni back. sorry it been so long. was butt fucking guido. he my mom’s goat. made mistake. grabbed super glue instead of ky jelly. had to go to hospital. people look at me and guido funny. wanted me to stay for observation. me say no. me not crazy. just like anal sex with goats. Zamboni not having good day. have to go to doctor. got yeast infection from mom. burns when i pee. have puss discharge. taste good though. if you like puss that is. will go to free clinic. don’t want to. have to. no money. clinic scare Zamboni. strange people there. most not normal like Zamboni. will take bus. go to bus stop. man at bus stop. he old. he smell like sweaty feet. will sit next to him. like the smell of dirty feet. man pick nose. pull out big booger. he roll it in his fingers. he flick it away. what a waste. boogers are good eating. my nuts itch. reach in pants. pinch spot that itches. pinch and roll. pinch and roll method is best. feels good. bus come. Zamboni get on bus. put tokens in slot. Zamboni yell, “GIMME A BUS PASS!” don’t need one. just like to yell gimme a bus pass. get pass. sit down. see pretty girl. sit next to her. she smell funny. not like mom though. mom smell like fish. taste like chicken. girl smell like flowers. fish smell better. stare at girl. she ask why i staring. tell her i think about her. her and guido. she ask who guido is. i tell her. she say i am sick. she move to other seat. bus get to clinic. get off bus. go inside. sign in. sit in waiting room. nurse come to get Zamboni. her name is april. she seem nice. she take Zamboni to room. tell me she needs to take my temperature. she get thermometer. ask me to open mouth. me say no. don’t want in mouth. want up butt. that why i like getting my temperature taken. she say ok. me drop pants. stick butt in air. april put thermometer in butt. Zamboni wait. she not do it right. tell her to do it right. she say she is doing it right. tell her she isn’t. tell her to move it in and out. like this. grab thermometer. move it in out in out in out. feels good. make me hot. will have temperature now. april tell me to stop. Zamboni stop. she tell Zamboni she need urine sample. me say ok. drop pants. start peeing. peeing everywhere. on walls floor april myself. april look mad now. Zamboni sorry. guess april don’t like being peed on. she not like mom. good ‘ol mom. she do it all. april gone now. man come in. his name is dr. smith. he ask me what my problem is. i tell him mom gave me yeast infection. tell him my penis still sore from the super glue incident. he say that not my problem. he say it is chemical imbalance in Zamboni’s brain. he give me prescription for penicillin. tell me to leave. Zamboni have to go to drugstore now. will write more later. bye bye now.

Zamboni here. am excited. go camping. mom , guido, and greta go too. guido and greta mom’s goats. get in mom’s truck. go to forrest. me ride in back. in back with guido and greta. take stanley out of my pocket. he my frog. people on interstate look at us funny. don’t know why. have to pee. stand up in truck. pull out horatio. he my penis. start peeing. guy behind us honking. he using sign language. Zamboni don’t know sign language. wave to him with horatio. keep peeing. yell at man behind us. tell him to turn on windshield wipers. he not very smart. done peeing. sit back down. guido pooped in back of truck. look at goat poop. see little white worms in poop. get worm to crawl on finger. me have new pet. guido lucky. he have pet worms in his butt. me want pet worm in butt. Zamboni pull down pants. put worm up butt. wind feel good on butt. stick butt over side of truck. car driving beside truck. boy stick tounge out at Zamboni. he must be hungry. probably want goat poop. goat poop good. taste like chicken. pick up goat poop. throw at boy. goat poop runny. stick to window of car. boy’s mom angry. she roll down window. she ask Zamboni what his problem is. tell her horatio itches. no problem other than that. she ask who . i say horatio. she can’t hear me. mom’s truck has no muffler. me point to horatio. horatio wave hi. her eyes get big. she start swerving. she drive in ditch. women drivers. look in truck window. see mom. she drinking beer. listening to country music. oh that mom. she one crazy chick. we stop at store. mom out of dip. she buy can of dip. Zamboni have quarter. me use phone. have pager. put on vibrate. put down pants. call pager number. BZZZZZZZ! BZZZZZZZ! BZZZZZZZ!. ooohhhhhh. feel so good. horatio throw up. tell mom i’m hungry. she buy me hotdog. get back in truck. get back on highway. get to forrest. find good spot. help mom pitch tent. mom chop wood. she built like lumberjack. she dress like lumberjack. she wear flannel shirt. she wear red fishnet stockings. mom sexy lumberjack. mom build fire. she cook dinner. cook baked beans. me like baked beans. make me fart. make mom fart. make guido and greta fart. fart fart fart. like to smell farts. our farts smell like fish. taste like chicken. will go on hike before dinner. take guido with me. hike for long time. meet park ranger. his name willie. willie nice person. he ask about guido. tell him he mom’s boyfriend. ask willie if he want to play with guido. he say sure. he pick up stick and throw it. i ask what he doing. he say he playing with guido. i say no no no. play with guido like this. Zamboni grab guidos balls. furry goat balls. sweaty goat balls. bouncy goat balls. fun furry sweaty bouncy goat balls. he look at me funny. ask him if he know yogi and boo-boo. he say not personnally. i like yogi and boo-boo. would like to have orgy with yogi boo-boo park ranger mom guido and greta. would need special picnic basket though. tell willie i have to go. mom fix dinner. get back to camp. mom putting special sauce on beans. she squat over pot. ooze ooze ooze. yum yum yum. Zambonis mouth watering. eat eat eat. yum yum yum. Zamboni get cramps now. have to poop. have to poop bad. pull down pants. take big poop. look at poop. me see many worms. worms had babies. Zamboni father now. hooray hooray hooray. me overjoyed. fatherhood a big responsibility though. Zamboni hope he can handle it. have to take care of my babies now. will write more some other day. bye bye now.

Zamboni here. very hot. me sweating. am naked. still sweating. look at balls. they sweating. play with balls. like to play with balls. feels good. will take cold shower. will help cool off. go in bathroom. mom in bathtub. wearing goggles snorkel and flippers. wants to play jaucces cousteau and the killer whale. me say o.k. jump in tub. game realistic since she smell like fish. gives it that ocean feeling. guido run in batroom. jump in tub with us. he is mom’s goat. guido starts urinating. mom says pretend like we in yellow sea. water too warm now. ask mom to fix breakfast. she says o.k. mom make pancakes. mom have special syrup for pancakes. mom put pancakes on plate. tell her i need syrup. mom squat over plate and rub herself. she push magic button and syrup come out of her pussy. syrup taste like chicken. make pancakes taste good. eat eat eat. yum yum yum. will go ride bike now. have to put on special shorts. have hole in back. Zamboni adjust seat on bike. it point straight up now. like to ride bike. it feel good. Zamboni go to girlfriends house. just found girlfriend. she has hairy chest. just around her nipples though. has hairy butt. like hairy women. remind me of mom. her name is elizabeth. we shave her butt today. knock on door. she answer. let me in. give Zamboni kiss. taste funny. sorta taste like chicken. me ask why. say she just puke. had chicken for lunch. that explain everything. ask her if we shave butt. she say yes. she go get razor and shaving cream. pull down pants. stick butt in air. Zamboni apply shaving cream. notice she didn’t wipe good. stop to eat. tasty butt crusty treats. finish eating. shave butt. all shaved now. she have many pimples on her butt. ask if i can pop zits. she say yes. start popping zits. puss shoot out. smell puss. Zamboni always smells before he eats. eat puss. sour puss. good sour butt zit puss. elizabeth like to do it in butt. ask if i can. she say yes. let out horatio. can’t get him in. need lubrication. will use butt zit puss. pop pop pop. lube lube lube. that work good. in out in out. horatio throw up in her butt. horatio always throwing up. all done. horatio asleep now. elizabeth want to do again. tell her i can’t tell her only goat poop warrior can do more than once. she get mad. tell me to leave. not come back unless i goat poop warrior. me go home. will find guido. he give me goat poop. get on bike. ride ride ride. feel good good good. get home. find guido. ask guido to poop. he no poop. he goat. he no understand english. Zamboni don’t know goat language. me think. me have idea. go to kitchen. boil water. get turkey baster. fill with boiling water. will find guido. here guido guido guido. here goatie goatie goatie. see my cat. he run away. he afraid of Zamboni. found guido. stick turkey baster up his butt.squeeze out boiling water. guido kick me in the nuts. me on ground. in pain. guido spray me with boiling goat poop. not having good day now. go inside. find mom. she kiss testicles. mom always make it all better. go back outside. big pile of steamy goat poop. put goat poop on face. like warpaint. me goat poop warrior now. me let out war cry. BAAAAHHHH! BAAAAHHHH! BAAAAHHHH!. me ready now. get on bike go to elizabeth’s house. she not home now. oh well. me go back home. am still ready to go all day and all night. guess henrietta will get lucky. she my hand. horatio like her best anyway. have to go. bye bye now.

my respect to Kibo. may he watch over Zamboni and keep him safe.

Zamboni here. had good weekend. got new pet. new pet is frog. Zamboni like frogs. frogs are green. green is second favorite color. purple favorite color. frogs are slimy. slimy is good. poop is slimy. like poop. name frog stanley. introduce stanley to horatio. horatio is my cock. hello horatio. hello stanley. they are my friends. they talk to me. they talk telepathically. introduce stanley to henrietta. henrietta my hand. henrietta and horatio love each other. they always horny. they like stanley. want to do three way with stanley. henrietta pick up stanley. rub him on horatio. froggie style. feel good. Zamboni like froggie style. horatio spit all over henrietta and stanley. me stop now. go in house. go in bathroom. open closet. get petroleum jelly. family size jar. mom uses all the time. uses for her goats. their names guido and gertrude. guido boy goat. not hung like goat. hung like mule. big goat dick. mom use jelly on it. open jelly. rub on stanley. slide stanley up butt. put up butt backwards. head stick out of butt. RIBIT RIBIT RIBIT. frog feel good up butt. don’t want warts on butt. take out of butt. put back in cage. go find mom. mom smell like fish. taste like chicken. mom in bedroom. guido sodomizing mom. see big goat dick. goat dick in mom’s butt. in out in out. mom screaming. AAIIIIIEEEE! AAIIIIEEEE! AAIIIIEEEE! guido screaming. BAAAAHHHH! BAAAAHHHH! BAAAAHHHH! Zamboni frightened. go outside now. walk to store. need condoms. always wear condoms. especially with mom. doctor give her creame. tell her to put on blisters. mom never use. Zamboni don’t want blisters. already have warts on butthole from stanley. get condoms. take to woman at counter. big woman. smelly woman. has beautiful black nose hair. tell her condoms not for me. she don’t believe Zamboni. tell her they for horatio. she ask who horatio is. i show her. wave to her with horatio. she scream. AAIIIIEEEE! AAIIIIEEEE! AAIIIIEEEE! Zamboni frightened again. run run run. fast fast fast. go back home. hungry now. go to refrigerator. find bologna. like bologna. get bread. make sandwich. sandwich bland. look for salt. no salt here. need salt for sandwich. where i get salt? Zamboni think. Zamboni know. remember goat pee is salty. look for guido. guido still with mom. lok for gertrude. find gertrude. wait for gertrude to pee. wait wait wait. finally she pee. soak sandwich in goat pee. take bite. much better. eat eat eat. yum yum yum. go outside. see mail man. he give me mail. look at mail. poor horatio. he never get mail. chase mailman. ask him why horatio never get mail. he ask who horatio is. i show him. wave to him with horatio. he don’t scream. he spray Zamboni with mace. now Zamboni scream. AAIIIIEEEE! AAIIIIEEEE! AAIIIIEEEE! run run run. fast fast fast. run home. get hose. spray face for long time. guess Zamboni lucky. he postal worker. could have shot Zamboni. don’t like mailman now. mom probably still like mailman. she like everybody. go back in house. mom done with guido. mom is naked. all she wear is cowboy hat. cowboy boots with spurs. wants to play game. game called ranch hand and lost cow. mom ranch hand. me cow. i say o.k. take of clothes. down on all fours. mom get rope. make lasso. she lasso Zamboni. hog tie me. says she need to brand me. put name on my butt in hickeys. oh that mom. she one kooky chick. me tired now. will write more later. bye bye now.

my respect to Kibo. may he watch over Zamboni and keep him safe.

it’s me again, back to tell you more. i have a gerbil. his name is fred. he has been in my butthole. i farted. smelled like eggs. don’t like eggs. sperm likes eggs. i wear panties. they are purple. i haven’t washed them this week. they are stained. i have a penis. don’t have a vagina. could have one put in. too expensive. would have to go to sweden. i like chef bork. would suck chef bork. don’t like barney . he is purple. still don’t like. would sodomize hard. i just urinated. i need a towel. i am constipated. will dig out. mom is pregnant. hope not by me. could be though. ate taco bell. won’t be constipated soon. my balls itch. will scratch. pinch and roll method. plucked my rectal hair. it hurt bad. made my eyes water. that’s o.k. pain is gone now. caused erection. will take care of. mom is home. she is naked. her tits sag. they are big. need an enema. would feel better then. would make mess. would lick up. you lick up? me don’t care. went to zoo. monkeys jack off. may taste good. fence too high. will use imagination. getting my camera. took picture of horatio. he is my cock. he is my friend. foto-mat fairy won’t like. that’s o.k. don’t like foto-mat fairy anyway. looking in trash. found used tampon. it is sticky. put on forehead. will fix lunch. will fix hotdogs. these i like. fit in butthole. feels so good. will still eat. would feel guilty if i did not. starving children everywhere. bra is to tight. my sack is wrinkled. looks like prune. i like prunes. they make me shit. shit is slimy. slimy is good. mom is slut. i am slut. sluts are cool.i spank my gonads. they swell up. mom will kiss. make all better. i am toilet trained. i serve all.went outside. it is raining. came back in. i saw mailman. he gave me things. i went to the dentist. don’t like dentist. mouth still numb. went to bar. got real drunk. passed out in urinal. not so bad. thirsty no more. i like goats. i sodomize goats. goats are tight. make weird noises. i like that. like goat’s milk. shoot up butt. shoot out butt. lick lick lick. yum yum yum. mom is hermaphrodite. she has penis. she has vagina. oh that mom. one lucky girl. or maybe boy. still not sure. hotdogs done. i put them in. they are hot. i take them out. i blow on them. put back in. that just right. in and out. that feel so good. eat eat eat. yum yum yum. i see my cats. they run away. i sodomize cats. they don’t like. mom has glass eye. i take out. i skull fuck her. it is weird. will write more. some other day.

Zamboni back. been long week. Zamboni work hard. not easy being pimp for mom. she get old. get loose. all dried up and stinky. drew smiley face on horatio. love horatio. he is my penis. he spit on me. horatio my penis. bad boy. no. he good boy. me like when horatio spit on me. drank purple juice. made poop green. made slimy. picked up and looked at. slimy poop. smelled good. good smelly slimy green poop. need girlfriend. looked for girlfriend. talked to girl. told her i hung like mule.asked me to show. i show. she laugh. no care. i have henrietta. she my hand. horatio love henrietta. henrietta love horatio. they happy. my butthole hurts. will remove finger. finger smell like poop. poop smell good. i like poop. i look at my nipples. i pinch nipples. it feel good. i pinch harder. ooo ooo ooo. ahh ahh ahh. i like nipples. i look at mom. she wear leather panties. she has rope. she tie me up. grab my balls. squeeze hard. me scream. it hurt. no matter. she kiss and make better. she sits on me. can’t breathe. mom big. see mom’s butthole. brown and crusty. me scrape off. me smell. always smell before i eat. it smell good. so i eat. doesn’t taste like chicken. taste like poop. went to store. bought condoms. put on horatio. got on henrietta. always safe. make good baloons too. like balloons. put up my butt. mom blows up. it feel good. got new bike. it is purple. i like purple. seat wasn’t right. i adjust seat. it point straight up now. ride all day. have to pee. it is warm. made me thirsty. all done now. no more pee. did not drink. still thirsty. will find guido. guido is mom’s goat. he give me drink. his pee warm. taste like salt. good warm salty goat pee. ate six burritos. made my butthole pee. made butthole burn. put butthole pee on finger. smell butthole pee. don’t smell like pee. smell like poop. smell like bad poop. me eat anyway. went to mall. saw woman. big woman. big hairy woman. remind me of mom. want this woman. she smell good. smell like guido. ask her to dance. she say no. say no music. ask her to dance again. she call policeman. policeman nice. he have big stick. make me think bad. he put on handcuffs. horatio throw up. warm and sticky. soon it dry. make pubic hair stick to underwear. won’t take off. would hurt. went to jail. met frank. frank big man. he scare Zamboni. want me to share bunk. i say no. he not my type. penis too small. he insist i share bunk. used all condoms to make balloons. hate balloons now. never make again. got out of jail . home now. go in bathroom. open toilet. look for little man in boat i see on tv. no man in boat. mom fix dinner. smell like fish . mom fix peas. get big plate. pull down pants. say hello to horatio. sit on peas. squish peas. feel good on my butt. scrape off with spoon. smell peas. smell like peas. so i eat. go find fred. fred is my gerbil. open butt cave for fred. his favorite place. fred stop to eat some peas. all done now. he inside. it tickles. ha ha ha. ho ho ho. have leash on fred. pull back out. smell fred. he smell like poop. won’t eat fred. fred my friend. will go eat mom. mom spread legs. see string. pull string. people always leave stuff in there. smell. don’t smell good. put back in. close mom’s legs. oh well. will just be hungry. Zamboni tired. go to bed. bye bye now.